"I have this here eleven-year-old daughter who, just last year at the start of middle school, was entrusted with her own cell phone, which she promptly lost like a Happy Meal toy. As punishment she went cell phone–free for as long as I could stand her to, because it turns out that the most agonizing moments in the history of forever are contained in the thirty minutes it takes for your girl to slowly meander the eleven blocks home from her new school every day."